down but not out...

I only lost .4 lbs this week :(

But I know why I didn't lose more and know where I should have made different choices.

I will drink more water, eat more protein and do some activity daily.

I plan to do great next weigh in!!

Congrats to Tracey and Melody for their losses - you are both doing great!! :)

need more time...

I feel like I have so much to do and just can't get anything done. I am still trying to figure out my daily commute and routine. I hate that the girls have to be in the car so much driving to Irving and back home. But it is temporary - Ava starts school in the fall and I will see about putting Zoe in a part time program at the same time.

I am hosting a Pampered Chef party on Saturday and am still stressing a little bit about the house not being the way I want it. I told myself it was ok but I wanted to at least have furniture by now LOL!

Ava just called me - she wants me to come home :( I asked her if everything was ok and she said yes, she just wanted to be with me. I wish I didn't have to work. I think she is going through a growth spurt right now and has been kind of emotional about lots of things.

A funny about Ava: she is an infomercial junkie! She told me we need to get BumpIts for her hair, TopsyTurvy to grow tomatoes (but she won't eat them) and she MUST have that toothpaste holder thing. Once we were in Target and she saw some herb planter thing and was reciting the commercial! And she was beside herself when she saw an AquaGlobe in the plant the former house owners left us!!
hmmm...maybe we watch a little too much tv??? :)

I am supposed to weigh in at WW tonight - I am sure I have a loss. I was premenstrual last week (TMI, sorry) and had Chinese for lunch. But I have been good about tracking my points and meals - and I have consciously made some better decisions about what I am eating. I do need to eat more veggies and milk/dairy and I need to be mindful of the little bites here and there (they do add up!).

Happy Wednesday ~

random weekend stuff...

well, I had plans to go furniture shopping on Saturday, specifically at Ikea. But Bridget was late picking up the girls and it messed up my schedule. So I settled for a quick trip to Target (again) and got a few household things.

Then it was off to meet Jacki and Christene for Bollywood Gay Bingo!!! Oh my gosh - that was so much fun!! Seriously, Henry Ramirez is a rock star for putting this event together every month. The icing on the cake was that I won $120 on one of the last games ~ woo hoo!!
We had a great thai dinner afterwards and I slept like a baby in my big comfy bed!

So to add to the annoyance, Bridget showed up with the girls at 9:30am! Really??? Since when does she wake up early enough to have the girls up and home by 9:30??? So again, my schedule was messed up. I think we really need to formalize a schedule and times. Right now, it is just all for her convenience. Yeah, that won't work for me! LOL

We went to Kylie's pajama birthday party and had a blast! Micki and Todd did a great job from the pillowcase craft project to the "pancake" cake! I only thought the girls were worn out, but once we got home, we played outside with the neighbor kids for about 2 hours. I let them run themselves ragged...after dinner and good bath, both girls crashed! That is a good day for me :)

I had a decent Weight Watchers weekend - although I had -18 points on Saturday :(
But I got back on track after that and I have made some good choices for my food. I am hoping for a loss on Wednesday - something to keep me going. Although my goals this week were to track my food, drink water and eat meals - so anything other than that is good with me.

Weight Watchers

So today is my first day back on the WW track. I get 24 daily points and 35 extra points a week.

I have found that I have 2 things to work on:

1. I don't eat throughout the day. I just ate my lunch at 1pm and did not have anything before that since last night's dinner. Especially during the work week, if I don't eat first thing before I get started, I just lose track of time.

2. Portion control. I really have a distorted perception of portion size. I need to be diligent about measuring and counting until I can do it out of habit.

But I am excited about having a plan - I know this works. Bridget and I lost a good amount of weight on it a few years ago. This plus getting back into some daily activity will be good for me!

one step forward, two steps back...

...but I am not going to let it get to me!

I had a fun night at bunco last night with a great group of women!! I went home and puttered around for a while and finally went to sleep all by myself in my big comfy bed. I looked over and realized that Ava forgot "Old Blue", her pillow! But luckily Mom has a spare and she did fine. I snuggled up to Blue and fell fast asleep :)

Tonight is my first Weight Watchers meeting (well, not really my "first", I went a few years ago). I need some accountability to finally get this weight off! I am hoping weekly weigh-ins will help. Wendy and I are also going to do Saturday morning weigh-ins and help each other. So I have no excuse now! I do need to get my treadmill out of storage and to the house soon!

Also, today is Earth Day ~ what "green" changes have you made in your daily life?
I am recycling more now that I have a big recycling bin in the garage that gets picked up once a week. I am also slightly addicted to re-usable shopping bags. I use them for everything!!

yikes ~ 2 weeks since my last post!

See what happens when you turn 42??? LOL

Things are going well, I think. I feel pretty scattered most of the time but only because I have so much I want to get done and not enough time. But everything will get there in time...I need to just slow down and enjoy the process.

The girls love this house and so do I. It feels so amazing to stop and look around and know that this is "home". My family came over today and I loved having them here. I have a crazy relationship with my parents and brothers. But today, I really enjoyed them and was happy to have them here.

I am also having some mixed feelings about Bridget. We talked last week and I felt like she finally heard me and what I was trying to express to her about some of our issues these past 17 years. It felt good to get it all out and really be heard. She helped me load up some stuff and take it to the house. When we left each other, we hugged for a long time and I started crying. It felt so final.
She brought dinner over on Wednesday and we had a good visit. She also brought breakfast this morning and we went shopping for new carseats for Ava. When she left, she hugged me and said she missed me. I told her that I missed her too - and I do. I don't know what will happen in the future. There definitely needs to be a lot of work for us to have a healthy relationship. Maybe time away will truly make us appreciate each other and want to be together again. And if not, at least we can have a good relationship for the girls.

I am 42 years old today...

I am not sad about being the age that I am , but I am sad at how fast the past 20 years have flown by. I know that all of my experiences have made me the person I am, good and bad.
So I cherish all those years and all the people who have been there along the way. Some are still with me, some are not...

I look forward to this year - I am excited to start anew.

And I really want another tattoo :)

I am the queen of over-commitment!

My mind is reeling with all the things I need to do this weekend!!

I want to get everything done to move into the house and I want to take care of some obligations and I want to have some fun with friends and I want to spend time alone and with my girls...whew!!!!

I know it won't always be like this, but for now, I need to stop and collect my thoughts and make a plan! :)

so...what do you have planned for the weekend?

changed my mind...

I was having headaches and nausea from stopping the meds cold turkey - duh!
I started again and will wean off of them this month. I am still going to try the Luminex and see if it gives me what I need. Thanks for the thoughts and concerns - I do appreciate the love!! :)

ack...meds...

I posted yesterday about stopping my meds, not necessarily on purpose. I ran out and then didn't get by my neighborhood pharmacy (that I adore but it closes at 7 and is not open on Sundays!). so I was feeling ok and decided that maybe I didn't really need them - I was on the lowest dose. anyway, last night, it really hit me. the last couple of days, I could feel the old irritations just under the surface. I was getting easily annoyed by everything the girls were doing. I let things that Bridget did/didn't do bother me all over again.
So it is apparent that the meds were doing what they were supposed to. I know better than to stop cold turkey and I didn't call my doctor to tell him.
But I have decided to try something a little more natural - I have some Luminex (from Melaleuca) on order and will try those out. I am still not going to refill my meds because you are not supposed to mix. I am going to try to wait it out until next week. I just need to try to focus and keep my cool. I do not want to take any of this out on the girls.

breathe...

edited to add: I will call my doctor today and fess up. I don't want anyone to worry ;)